Beyond making a Will

When thinking about our future dying time, perhaps the first task that comes to mind is to make or update a Will. This might feel particularly important if financial or family arrangements are complex, and having a Will can help us feel like our affairs are in order and social obligations are met. A Will can certainly make things much more straightforward for those we leave behind.

It is worth recognising how hard it can be to make this step: most adults in the UK do not have a Will. There are plenty of reasons for avoiding making a Will; we feel too young for it to be relevant, it could be expensive to do, we don’t think we have any money or property to pass on, it takes time and thought and ultimately requires us to spend a little while imagining how things might be after we die.

Perhaps making a Will might be both a difficult thing to do, and an easy place to end our preparations for a deeper reason. Perhaps readying for our death solely by making a Will reduces us and our lives to a legal document.

You are so much more than your money, your property, and even your legal custody of your children.

We might understand that a whole human is a physical, emotional and spiritual (or meaning making, if that word doesn’t work for you) being. The idea of end of life planning beginning and ending with making a Will can begin to feel more like buying house insurance than preparing for the ultimate unknown and the ultimate letting go.

Maybe this is why it can be so much easier to make a Will than make decisions about medical treatment, work on how you wish your relationships to be as your life comes to an end, and consider what your life might mean to you and others.

If making a Will becomes a small step in our preparations, it might feel less monumental and so easier to do. Having a Will is useful.

If making a Will becomes a small step in our preparations, it might feel easier to take another small step towards a readiness that recognises the wholeness, complexity and richness of the person you are.